doubting thomas

What will be left when I've drawn my last breath
Besides the folks I've met and the folks who've known me
Will I discover a soul-saving love
Or just the dirt above and below me

I'm a doubting Thomas
I took a promise
But I do not feel safe
Oh me of little faith

Sometimes I pray for a slap in the face
Then I beg to be spared cause I'm a coward
If there's a master of death
I bet he's holding his breath
As I show the blind and tell the deaf about his power

I'm a doubting Thomas
I can't keep my promises
Cause I don't know what's safe
Oh me of little faith

Can I be used to help others find truth
When I'm scared I'll find proof that it's a lie
Can I be led down a trail dropping bread crumbs
That prove I'm not ready to die

Please give me time to decipher the signs
Please forgive me for time that I've wasted

I'm a doubting Thomas
I'll take your promise
You've always kept me safe
Oh me of little faith



oh me of little faith...yea thats me alot. its easy to question everthing, but then again wouldnt it be easier to jus let things the way they are?....heh no cause that would make me uncomfrotable. so to keep my comfartablility, i would have to stay in my own buble of friends, family, activities, etc. thats just selfish. what about all of the people out there who dont even know who God is? I know God, and i want everyone to be able to expierence the relationship with him that i have expierenced so far in my life. It hurts to think about how many friends, or aquaintances that i pretty much just let out of my life, with out really reaching out to them. ill never for get what a speaker said at a conference i was at one summer "I dont want to go to heaven and see a coworker standing before God, and looking at me with that look on his face saying 'why didnt you tell me?' "..when i heard that story, everything clicked. i dont want to be sitting around, doing nothing for God. I want to be able to share about im with others. let them know about my personal relaitonship with our Father, and what its feels like to be apart of this big loving family. like the song says, "sometimes i pray for a slap in the face, but then i beg to be spared because im a coward.." i dont want to be spared this time. ive taken the slap in the face...and i want to work toward not being a coward.